This is a small story I read in some school textbook while I was child. I am trying to recall the story.
There was a Religious person and a Scientist who came across each other at some place.
While they began their conversation with each other the Religious person claimed that 'You Scientist misguide people to go against God in the name of Science and due to this people are losing thier values'
To this the Scientist said,"This is not correct that the science is misguiding people but it rather helps people understand that there is something called God"
He Continued....
'Look for example we say there is a Law of Gravitation where in all the planets are rotating around the Sun in a very systematic way, Now when we say there is a Law then there must be a Lawmaker, who else can be a finest law maker of such a fantastic system other than the God.
Infact Science helps people to understand the wonderful phenomenan created by God that you describe to People.'
If you find example Scientist like Albert Einstien also mentioned believing in God. Even Newton himself was praiser of Nature, see he liked to watch nature closely thats how he noticed a apple falling from a tree that resulted in one of the greatest theories of world.
ONE BEDROOM FLAT
ONE BEDROOM FLAT...
WRITTEN BY AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER..-
A Bitter RealityAs the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software
Engineer and joined a company based in USA , the land of braves and
opportunity.
When I arrived in the USA , it was as if a dream had come true. Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would bestaying in this country for about Five years in which time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India .
My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.
I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone cards.
Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald's and pizzas and discos and 2 years watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.
Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be talks.
After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate.
In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays.
After the marriage, it was time to return to USA , after giving some money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to USA .
My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India increased to twice in aweek sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing.
After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl,were gifted to us by the almighty.
Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to India so that they can see their grand-children.
Every year I decide to go to India .. But part work part monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting India was a distant dream.
Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India ..
The next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done whatever they could.
I was depressed.
My parents had passed away without seeing their grand children.
After couple more years passed away, much to my children's dislike and my wife's joy we returned to India to settle down. I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years.
I had to return to the USA ..My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay inIndia .. My 2 children and I returned to USA after promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.
Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in USA ..
I decided that had enough and wound-up everything and returned to India . I had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality.
Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and gone to the holy abode.
Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this? My father, even after staying in India , had a house to his name and I too have the same nothing more.
I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.
Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing.This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are losing their values and culture because of it.
I get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me.
Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them.
But the question still remains 'was all this worth it?'
I am still searching for an answer................!!!
WRITTEN BY AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER..-
A Bitter RealityAs the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software
Engineer and joined a company based in USA , the land of braves and
opportunity.
When I arrived in the USA , it was as if a dream had come true. Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would bestaying in this country for about Five years in which time I would have earned enough money to settle down in India .
My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.
I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every week using cheap international phone cards.
Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald's and pizzas and discos and 2 years watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.
Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home. If I miss anyone then there will be talks.
After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate.
In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays.
After the marriage, it was time to return to USA , after giving some money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to USA .
My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India increased to twice in aweek sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing.
After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a girl,were gifted to us by the almighty.
Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to India so that they can see their grand-children.
Every year I decide to go to India .. But part work part monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting India was a distant dream.
Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn't get any holidays and thus could not go to India ..
The next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done whatever they could.
I was depressed.
My parents had passed away without seeing their grand children.
After couple more years passed away, much to my children's dislike and my wife's joy we returned to India to settle down. I started to look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years.
I had to return to the USA ..My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay inIndia .. My 2 children and I returned to USA after promising my wife I would be back for good after two years.
Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in USA ..
I decided that had enough and wound-up everything and returned to India . I had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality.
Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and gone to the holy abode.
Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this? My father, even after staying in India , had a house to his name and I too have the same nothing more.
I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.
Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing.This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are losing their values and culture because of it.
I get occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me.
Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them.
But the question still remains 'was all this worth it?'
I am still searching for an answer................!!!
Failure is never final
Failure doesn't mean you are a failure
It does mean you haven't succeeded yet .
Failure doesn't mean you have accomplished nothing
It does mean you have learned something.
Failure doesn't mean you have been a fool
It does mean you had a lot of faith….
Failure doesn't mean you don't have it
It does mean you have to do something in a different way.
Failure doesn't mean you'll never make it
It does mean it will take a little longer.
Failure doesn't mean God has abandoned you
It does mean God has a BETTER IDEA .
Failure doesn't mean you're punished
It does mean a chance to try something new.
So it is true! Failure is never final !!
It does mean you haven't succeeded yet .
Failure doesn't mean you have accomplished nothing
It does mean you have learned something.
Failure doesn't mean you have been a fool
It does mean you had a lot of faith….
Failure doesn't mean you don't have it
It does mean you have to do something in a different way.
Failure doesn't mean you'll never make it
It does mean it will take a little longer.
Failure doesn't mean God has abandoned you
It does mean God has a BETTER IDEA .
Failure doesn't mean you're punished
It does mean a chance to try something new.
So it is true! Failure is never final !!
Break...
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted. As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car.Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him intohis private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautiful wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angrily, he raised his voice to his father and said, "With all your money you give me a Bible? and stormed out of thehouse, leaving the Bible. Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had carefully underlined a verse, Matt 7:11, "And if ye, being evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Heavenly father which is in heaven, give to those who ask Him?" As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag wasthe date of his graduation, and the words...................
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..
.
PAID IN FULL. How many times do we miss God's blessings because they are notpackaged as we expected? I trust you enjoyed this. Pass it on to others. Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for...IF YOUR GIFT IS NOT PACKED THE WAY YOU WANT IT, IT'S BECAUSE IT IS BETTER PACKED THAT WAY! ALWAYS APPRECIATE LITTLE THINGS; THEY USUALLY LEAD YOU TO ATTACHMENTS
.............
.........
.....
..
.
PAID IN FULL. How many times do we miss God's blessings because they are notpackaged as we expected? I trust you enjoyed this. Pass it on to others. Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for...IF YOUR GIFT IS NOT PACKED THE WAY YOU WANT IT, IT'S BECAUSE IT IS BETTER PACKED THAT WAY! ALWAYS APPRECIATE LITTLE THINGS; THEY USUALLY LEAD YOU TO ATTACHMENTS
7 Ways To Make a Great First Impression
When you have an important event to attend there are 7 great ways to make sure you perform at your very best. These tips are relevant for social events and business meetings. Discover how to communicate with confidence while making great conversation.
1. Decide what you want to say before the event. Review it in your mind to make sure it sounds okay. Keep rehearsing it until you can say it with conviction and confidence.
2. Consider your potential listeners. Who will you be talking to and which topics of conversation will be welcome? You need to make sure your message matches your audience.
3. Be yourself. The worst mistake is to pretend you are something you are not. People will see through you and distrust everything you say. Even if you communicate clearly and with confidence.
4. Never expect things to work out perfectly. Be ready to deal with problems by deciding in advance what you will do. What will you do if people ignore your input? Now is the time to decide and not later on in the heat of the moment.
5. Be flexible in your approach. Different people need to be treated differently. Pay very close attention to how people respond to what you say and keep adjusting your approach until you have a good rapport with your listener.
6. Make the other person the focus of your attention and let him lead the conversation in the early stages. Let that person steer the conversation onto topics that are of interest to him.
7. Anticipate what could go wrong. Then do what you can to make sure those scenarios do not occur. Adequate planning is the key to performing at your best in the moment.
The Power of Three Little Words in our Life
The Power of Three Little Words :
Some of the most significant messages people deliver to one another often come in just three words. When spoken or conveyed, those statements have the power to forge new friendships, deepen old ones and restore relationships that have cooled. The following three-word phrases can enrich every relationship.
1) I'LL BE THERE : Being there for another person is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly present for other people, important things happen to them and to us. We are renewed in love and friendship. We are restored emotionally and spiritually. 'Being there' is at the very very core of civility.
2) I MISS YOU : Perhaps more marriages could be salvaged and strengthened if couples simply and sincerely said to each other, "I miss you." This powerful affirmation tells partners they are wanted, needed, desired and loved.
3) I RESPECT YOU : Respect is another way of showing love. Respect conveys the feeling that another person is a true equal. It is a powerful way to affirm the importance of a relationship.
4) MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT : This phrase is highly effective in diffusing an argument and restoring frayed emotions. The flip side of "maybe you're right" is the humility of admitting "maybe I'm wrong."
5) PLEASE FORGIVE ME : Many broken relationships could be restored and healed if people would admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and failures. A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
6) I THANK YOU : Gratitude is an exquisite form of courtesy. People who enjoy the companionship of good, close friends are those who don't take daily courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank their friends for their many expressions of kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle of friends is severely constricted often do not have the attitude of gratitude.
7) COUNT ON ME : "A friend is one who walks in when others walk out," Loyalty is an essential ingredient for true friendship; it is the emotional glue that bonds people. Those who are rich in their relationships tend to be steady and true friends. When troubles come, a good friend is there, indicating "you can count on me."
8) LET ME HELP : The best of friends see a need and try to fill it. When they spot a hurt they do what they can to heal it. Without being asked, they pitch in and help.
9) I UNDERSTAND YOU : People become closer and enjoy each other more if they feel the other person accepts and understands them. Letting others know in so many little ways that you understand him or her is one of the most powerful tools for healing your relationship.
10) GO FOR IT : Some of your friends may be non conformists, have unique projects and unusual hobbies. Support them in pursuing their interests. Rather than urging your loved ones to conform, encourage their uniqueness-everyone has dreams that no one else has.
I suppose the 3 little words that you were expecting to see have to be reserved for those who are special; that is I LOVE YOU.
"We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
Pause and ponder. Think before you act. Be patient. Forgive & forget. Love one and all.
If you judge people, you have no time to love them". -- Mother Teresa
Never take some one for granted,Hold every person Close to your Heart because you might wake up one day and realise that you have lost a diamond while you were too busy collecting stones."
Remember this always in life.
Some of the most significant messages people deliver to one another often come in just three words. When spoken or conveyed, those statements have the power to forge new friendships, deepen old ones and restore relationships that have cooled. The following three-word phrases can enrich every relationship.
1) I'LL BE THERE : Being there for another person is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly present for other people, important things happen to them and to us. We are renewed in love and friendship. We are restored emotionally and spiritually. 'Being there' is at the very very core of civility.
2) I MISS YOU : Perhaps more marriages could be salvaged and strengthened if couples simply and sincerely said to each other, "I miss you." This powerful affirmation tells partners they are wanted, needed, desired and loved.
3) I RESPECT YOU : Respect is another way of showing love. Respect conveys the feeling that another person is a true equal. It is a powerful way to affirm the importance of a relationship.
4) MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT : This phrase is highly effective in diffusing an argument and restoring frayed emotions. The flip side of "maybe you're right" is the humility of admitting "maybe I'm wrong."
5) PLEASE FORGIVE ME : Many broken relationships could be restored and healed if people would admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and failures. A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
6) I THANK YOU : Gratitude is an exquisite form of courtesy. People who enjoy the companionship of good, close friends are those who don't take daily courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank their friends for their many expressions of kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle of friends is severely constricted often do not have the attitude of gratitude.
7) COUNT ON ME : "A friend is one who walks in when others walk out," Loyalty is an essential ingredient for true friendship; it is the emotional glue that bonds people. Those who are rich in their relationships tend to be steady and true friends. When troubles come, a good friend is there, indicating "you can count on me."
8) LET ME HELP : The best of friends see a need and try to fill it. When they spot a hurt they do what they can to heal it. Without being asked, they pitch in and help.
9) I UNDERSTAND YOU : People become closer and enjoy each other more if they feel the other person accepts and understands them. Letting others know in so many little ways that you understand him or her is one of the most powerful tools for healing your relationship.
10) GO FOR IT : Some of your friends may be non conformists, have unique projects and unusual hobbies. Support them in pursuing their interests. Rather than urging your loved ones to conform, encourage their uniqueness-everyone has dreams that no one else has.
I suppose the 3 little words that you were expecting to see have to be reserved for those who are special; that is I LOVE YOU.
"We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
Pause and ponder. Think before you act. Be patient. Forgive & forget. Love one and all.
If you judge people, you have no time to love them". -- Mother Teresa
Never take some one for granted,Hold every person Close to your Heart because you might wake up one day and realise that you have lost a diamond while you were too busy collecting stones."
Remember this always in life.
Taking control of your life in 7 steps
Taking control of your life is getting in touch with your values, setting meaningful goals and identifying your vision. To be in control of where life is taking you means being more productive, dealing more effectively with stress, having the ability to solve problems, handing change and developing healthy optimism. Start with these 7 steps and you are on your way.
1. Get in touch with your values:
When we feel like we are working hard but not getting anywhere it is probably because our priorities are not aligned with our values. To begin identifying your values ask yourself these questions:
- What is important to me? Wisdom, freedom, happiness, equality, security, self-respect, romantic love, money, power, comfortable living, fresh air, beauty, controlling others, etc. Rate these values.
- Who is important to me?
- What or who is most important? Be honest with yourself.
- What do I need to do to feel good about myself?
- How would you feel if someone you respect knew this was one of your values?
- Would you stick by this value?
- Is it who you are?
- How is this value affecting your life?
Make a list of your 10 top values. Of that 10 choose 4 and of the 4 choose your top two. From this exercise you will see where you need to focus your time and effort.
2. Decide what motivates you:
If tomorrow you knew you could do anything and not fail what would you do? Is there something you are passionate about but are afraid of trying? If you have no idea what your passion is spend some time reflecting on it. To start, write down the types of activities you like to do and the types of activities (hobbies) that make you feel good when you do them. What are your special skills and talents ? Don't be shy ? Usually if it's something we like to do we are probably good at it. What inspires you?
3. Set Goals:
In order to get what you really want you must start by setting goals. Goals fuel your intent and make your desires concrete. Start by writing the goals for this year in area of personal relationships, work, health, finances and spirituality. List five goals in each category (add more categories if you like). Then break them down into monthly and then weekly goals. Focusing on what you intend in your life will bring it to reality. You create your life ? So start now by setting your goals.
4. Take Action:
Goals are worthless without action. If you have written long-term and short-term goals and prioritized them, you have a plan of action. Just take it one step at a time and do something everyday that takes you closer to where you want to be. Remember however, to live in the present and be thankful for what you have now, enjoying the journey toward your goals. Read more information at : http://online-articles.org/coaching/site-map.php
5. Manage Your Time:
We all have the same amount of time to use in a day. Why do some people a lot done while others do very little? You have complete control of how much time you spend productively and how much you waste. Plan your days and prioritize your time to get the most out of the time you have. Use time-wasters like standing in line or waiting in a doctor's office to catch up on reading or something else that is important to you.
6. Do What Needs to be Done:
Do what has to be done to get to where you want to go. Whether it is a mundane task or internal work, putting it off gets us nowhere. You are either going forward or falling behind; there is no such thing as standing still. Sometimes when we work on ourselves we stop when we get to a place that we need to change. Change can be difficult when we have to step out of our comfort zone. The more change is needed the more difficult it is.
7. Self-discipline:
Self-discipline is the final step that takes all that we have learned and puts it into action. This is a trait that for most of us has to be developed. To reach our goals we must visualize them as already being accomplished and have faith that we can reach them. When you believe in and trust yourself and have enough desire, self-discipline comes easily.
Realize
To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident...
To! realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.
To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident...
To! realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.
To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.
Kabuliwala - by Rabindranath Tagore
My five years' old daughter Mini cannot live without chattering. I really believe that in
all her life she has not wasted a minute in silence. Her mother is often vexed at this,
and would stop her prattle, but I would not. To see Mini quiet is unnatural, and I
cannot bear it long. And so my own talk with her is always lively.
One morning, for instance, when I was in the midst of the seventeenth chapter of my
new novel, my little Mini stole into the room, and putting her hand into mine, said:
"Father! Ramdayal the doorkeeper calls a crow a krow! He doesn't know anything,
does he?"
Before I could explain to her the differences of language in this world, she was
embarked on the full tide of another subject. "What do you think, Father? Bhola says
there is an elephant in the clouds, blowing water out of his trunk, and that is why it
rains!"
And then, darting off anew, while I sat still making ready some reply to this last
saying, "Father! what relation is Mother to you?"
"My dear little sister in the law!" I murmured involuntarily to myself, but with a grave
face contrived to answer: "Go and play with Bhola, Mini! I am busy!"
The window of my room overlooks the road. The child had seated herself at my feet
near my table, and was playing softly, drumming on her knees. I was hard at work
on my seventeenth chapter, where Protrap Singh, the hero, had just caught
Kanchanlata, the heroine, in his arms, and was about to escape with her by the third
story window of the castle, when all of a sudden Mini left her play, and ran to the
window, crying, "A Kabuliwallah! a Kabuliwallah!" Sure enough in the street below
was a Kabuliwallah, passing slowly along. He wore the loose soiled clothing of his
people, with a tall turban; there was a bag on his back, and he carried boxes of
grapes in his hand.
I cannot tell what were my daughter's feelings at the sight of this man, but she began
to call him loudly. "Ah!" I thought, "he will come in, and my seventeenth chapter will
never be finished!" At which exact moment the Kabuliwallah turned, and looked up
at the child. When she saw this, overcome by terror, she fled to her mother's
protection, and disappeared. She had a blind belief that inside the bag, which the big
man carried, there were perhaps two or three other children like herself. The pedlar
meanwhile entered my doorway, and greeted me with a smiling face.
So precarious was the position of my hero and my heroine, that my first impulse was
to stop and buy something, since the man had been called. I made some small
purchases, and a conversation began about Abdurrahman, the Russians, the English,
and the Frontier Policy.
As he was about to leave, he asked: "And where is the little girl, sir?"
And I, thinking that Mini must get rid of her false fear, had her brought out.
She stood by my chair, and looked at the Kabuliwallah and his bag. He offered her
nuts and raisins, but she would not be tempted, and only clung the closer to me, with
all her doubts increased.
This was their first meeting.
One morning, however, not many days later, as I was leaving the house, I was
startled to find Mini, seated on a bench near the door, laughing and talking, with the
great Kabuliwallah at her feet. In all her life, it appeared; my small daughter had
never found so patient a listener, save her father. And already the corner of her little
sari was stuffed with almonds and raisins, the gift of her visitor, "Why did you give
her those?" I said, and taking out an eight-anna bit, I handed it to him. The man
accepted the money without demur, and slipped it into his pocket.
Alas, on my return an hour later, I found the unfortunate coin had made twice its own
worth of trouble! For the Kabuliwallah had given it to Mini, and her mother catching
sight of the bright round object, had pounced on the child with: "Where did you get
that eight-anna bit? "
"The Kabuliwallah gave it me," said Mini cheerfully.
"The Kabuliwallah gave it you!" cried her mother much shocked. "Oh, Mini! how
could you take it from him?"
I, entering at the moment, saved her from impending disaster, and proceeded to
make my own inquiries.
It was not the first or second time, I found, that the two had met. The Kabuliwallah
had overcome the child's first terror by a judicious bribery of nuts and almonds, and
the two were now great friends.
They had many quaint jokes, which afforded them much amusement. Seated in front
of him, looking down on his gigantic frame in all her tiny dignity, Mini would ripple
her face with laughter, and begin: "O Kabuliwallah, Kabuliwallah, what have you got
in your bag?"
And he would reply, in the nasal accents of the mountaineer: "An elephant!" Not
much cause for merriment, perhaps; but how they both enjoyed the witticism! And
for me, this child's talk with a grown-up man had always in it something strangely
fascinating.
Then the Kabuliwallah, not to be behindhand, would take his turn: "Well, little one,
and when are you going to the father-in-law's house?"
Now most small Bengali maidens have heard long ago about the father-in-law's
house; but we, being a little new-fangled, had kept these things from our child, and
Mini at this question must have been a trifle bewildered. But she would not show it,
and with ready tact replied: "Are you going there?"
Amongst men of the Kabuliwallah's class, however, it is well known that the words
father-in-law's house have a double meaning. It is a euphemism for jail, the place
where we are well cared for, at no expense to ourselves. In this sense would the
sturdy pedlar take my daughter's question. "Ah," he would say, shaking his fist at an
invisible policeman, "I will thrash my father-in-law!" Hearing this, and picturing the
poor discomfited relative, Mini would go off into peals of laughter, in which her
formidable friend would join.
These were autumn mornings, the very time of year when kings of old went forth to
conquest; and I, never stirring from my little corner in Calcutta, would let my mind
wander over the whole world. At the very name of another country, my heart would
go out to it, and at the sight of a foreigner in the streets, I would fall to weaving a
network of dreams, --the mountains, the glens, and the forests of his distant home,
with his cottage in its setting, and the free and independent life of far-away wilds.
Perhaps the scenes of travel conjure
themselves up before me, and pass and repass in my imagination all the more vividly,
because I lead such a vegetable existence, that a call to travel would fall upon me
like a thunderbolt.
In the presence of this Kabuliwallah, I was immediately transported to the foot of
arid mountain peaks, with narrow little defiles twisting in and out amongst their
towering heights. I could see the string of camels bearing the merchandise, and the
company of turbaned merchants, carrying some of their queer old firearms, and
some of their spears, journeying downward towards the plains. I could see--but at
some such point Mini's mother would intervene, imploring me to "beware of that
man."
Mini's mother is unfortunately a very timid lady. Whenever she hears a noise in the
street, or sees people coming towards the house, she always jumps to the conclusion
that they are either thieves, or drunkards, or snakes, or tigers, or malaria or
cockroaches, or caterpillars, or an English sailor. Even after all these years of
experience, she is not able to overcome her terror. So she was full of doubts about
the Kabuliwallah, and used to beg me to keep a watchful eye on him.
I tried to laugh her fear gently away, but then she would turn round on me seriously,
and ask me solemn questions.
Were children never kidnapped?
Was it, then, not true that there was slavery in Kabul?
Was it so very absurd that this big man should be able to carry off a tiny child?
I urged that, though not impossible, it was highly improbable. But this was not
enough, and her dread persisted. As it was indefinite, however, it did not seem right
to forbid the man the house, and the intimacy went on unchecked.
Once a year in the middle of January Rahmun, the Kabuliwallah, was in the habit of
returning to his country, and as the time approached he would be very busy, going
from house to house collecting his debts. This year, however, he could always find
time to come and see Mini. It would have seemed to an outsider that there was some
conspiracy between the two, for when he could not come in the morning, he would
appear in the evening.
Even to me it was a little startling now and then, in the corner of a dark room,
suddenly to surprise this tall, loose-garmented, much bebagged man; but when Mini
would run in smiling, with her, "O! Kabuliwallah! Kabuliwallah!" and the two friends,
so far apart in age, would subside into their old laughter and their old jokes, I felt
reassured.
One morning, a few days before he had made up his mind to go, I was correcting my
proof sheets in my study. It was chilly weather. Through the window the rays of the
sun touched my feet, and the slight warmth was very welcome. It was almost eight
o'clock, and the early pedestrians were returning home, with their heads covered. All
at once, I heard an uproar in the street, and, looking out, saw Rahmun being led
away bound between two policemen, and behind them a crowd of curious boys.
There were blood-stains on the clothes of the Kabuliwallah, and one of the
policemen carried a knife.
Hurrying out, I stopped them, and enquired what it all meant. Partly from one, partly
from another, I gathered that a certain neighbour had owed the pedlar something for
a Rampuri shawl, but had falsely denied having bought it, and that in the course of
the quarrel, Rahmun had struck him. Now in the heat of his excitement, the prisoner
began calling his enemy all sorts of names, when suddenly in a verandah of my house
appeared my little Mini, with her usual exclamation: "O Kabuliwallah! Kabuliwallah!"
Rahmun's face lighted up as he turned to her. He had no bag under his arm today, so
she could not discuss the elephant with him. She at once therefore proceeded to the
next question: "Are you going to the father-in-law's house?" Rahmun laughed and
said: "Just where I am going, little one!" Then seeing that the reply did not amuse the
child, he held up his fettered hands. " Ali," he said, " I would have thrashed that old
father-in-law, but my hands are bound!"
On a charge of murderous assault, Rahmun was sentenced to some years'
imprisonment.
Time passed away, and he was not remembered. The accustomed work in the
accustomed place was ours, and the thought of the once-free mountaineer spending
his years in prison seldom or never occurred to us. Even my light-hearted Mini, I am
ashamed to say, forgot her old friend. New companions filled her life. As she grew
older, she spent more of her time with girls. So much time indeed did she spend with
them that she came no more, as she used to do, to her father's room. I was scarcely
on speaking terms with her.
Years had passed away. It was once more autumn and we had made arrangements
for our Mini's marriage. It was to take place during the Puja Holidays. With Durga
returning to Kailas, the light of our home also was to depart to her husband's house,
and leave her father's in the shadow.
The morning was bright. After the rains, there was a sense of ablution in the air, and
the sun-rays looked like pure gold. So bright were they that they gave a beautiful
radiance even to the sordid brick walls of our Calcutta lanes. Since early dawn
to-day the wedding-pipes had been sounding, and at each beat my own heart
throbbed. The wail of the tune, Bhairavi, seemed to intensify my pain at the
approaching separation. My Mini was to be married to-night.
From early morning noise and bustle had pervaded the house. In the courtyard the
canopy had to be slung on its bamboo poles; the chandeliers with their tinkling sound
must be hung in each room and verandah. There was no end of hurry and
excitement. I was sitting in my study, looking through the accounts, when some one
entered, saluting respectfully, and stood before me. It was Rahmun the Kabuliwallah.
At first I did not recognise him. He had no bag, nor the long hair, nor the same
vigour that he used to have. But he smiled, and I knew him again.
"When did you come, Rahmun?" I asked him.
"Last evening," he said, "I was released from jail."
The words struck harsh upon my ears. I had never before talked with one who had
wounded his fellow, and my heart shrank within itself, when I realised this, for I felt
that the day would have been better-omened had he not turned up.
"There are ceremonies going on," I said, "and I am busy. Could you perhaps come
another day?"
At once he turned to go; but as he reached the door he hesitated, and said: "May I
not see the little one, sir, for a moment?" It was his belief that Mini was still the same.
He had pictured her running to him as she used, calling "O Kabuliwallah!
Kabuliwallah!" He had imagined too that they would laugh and talk together, just as
of old. In fact, in memory of former days he had brought, carefully wrapped up in
paper, a few almonds and raisins and grapes, obtained somehow from a
countryman, for his own little fund was dispersed.
I said again: "There is a ceremony in the house, and you will not be able to see any
one to-day."
The man's face fell. He looked wistfully at me for a moment, said "Good morning,"
and went out. I felt a little sorry, and would have called him back, but I found he was
returning of his own accord. He came close up to me holding out his offerings and
said: "I brought these few things, sir, for the little one. Will you give them to her?"
I took them and was going to pay him, but he caught my hand and said: "You are
very kind, sir! Keep me in your recollection. Do not offer me money!--You have a
little girl, I too have one like her in my own home. I think of her, and bring fruits to
your child, not to make a profit for myself."
Saying this, he put his hand inside his big loose robe, and brought out a small and
dirty piece of paper. With great care he unfolded this, and smoothed it out with both
hands on my table. It bore the impression of a little band. Not a photograph. Not a
drawing. The impression of an ink-smeared hand laid flat on the paper. This touch of
his own little daughter had been always on his heart, as he had come year after year
to Calcutta, to sell his wares in the streets.
Tears came to my eyes. I forgot that he was a poor Kabuli fruit-seller, while I
was--but no, what was I more than he? He also was a father. That impression of the
hand of his little Parbati in her distant mountain home reminded me of my own little
Mini.
I sent for Mini immediately from the inner apartment. Many difficulties were raised,
but I would not listen. Clad in the red silk of her wedding-day, with the sandal paste
on her forehead, and adorned as a young bride, Mini came, and stood bashfully
before me.
The Kabuliwallah looked a little staggered at the apparition. He could not revive their
old friendship. At last he smiled and said: "Little one, are you going to your
father-in-law's house?"
But Mini now understood the meaning of the word "father-in-law," and she could not
reply to him as of old. She flushed up at the question, and stood before him with her
bride-like face turned down.
I remembered the day when the Kabuliwallah and my Mini had first met, and I felt
sad. When she had gone, Rahmun heaved a deep sigh, and sat down on the floor.
The idea had suddenly come to him that his daughter too must have grown in this
long time, and that he would have to make friends with her anew. Assuredly he
would not find her, as he used to know her. And besides, what might not have
happened to her in these eight years?
The marriage-pipes sounded, and the mild autumn sun streamed round us. But
Rahmun sat in the little Calcutta lane, and saw before him the barren mountains of
Afghanistan.
I took out a bank-note, and gave it to him, saying: "Go back to your own daughter,
Rahmun, in your own country, and may the happiness of your meeting bring good
fortune to my child!"
Having made this present, I had to curtail some of the festivities. I could not have the
electric lights I had intended, nor the military band, and the ladies of the house were
despondent at it. But to me the wedding feast was all the brighter for the thought that
in a distant land a long-lost father met again with his only child.
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-- Robert Frost
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-- Robert Frost
Love Story of Narayana Murthy and Sudha (From Sudha's Autobiography)
It was in Pune that I met Narayan Murty through my friend Prasanna who is now the Wipro chief, who was also training in Telco. Most of the books that Prasanna lent me had Murty's name on them which meant that I had a preconceived image of the man. Contrary to expectation, Murty was shy, bespectacled and an introvert. When he invited us for dinner.I was a bit taken aback as I thought the young man was making a very fast move. I refused since I was the only girl in the group. But Murty was relentless and we all decided to meet for dinner the next day at 7.30 p.m. at Green Fields hotel on the Main Road ,Pune. The next day I went there at 7' o clock since I had to go to the tailor near the hotel. And what do I see?
Mr. Murty waiting in front of the hotel and it was only seven.
Till today, Murty maintains that I had mentioned (consciously!) that I would be going to the tailor at 7 so that I could meet him...And I maintain that I did not say any such thing consciously or unconsciously because I did not think of Murty as anything other than a friend at that stage. We have agreed to disagree on this matter. Soon, we became friends.
Our conversations were filled with Murty's experiences abroad and the books that he has read. My friends insisted that Murty as trying to impress me because he was interested in me. kept denying it till one fine day, after dinner Murty said, I want to tell you something. I knew this as it. It was coming. He said, I am 5'4" tall. I come from a lower middle class family. I can never become rich in my life and I can never give you any riches. You are beautiful, bright, and intelligent and you can get
anyone you want. But will you marry me?
It was in Pune that I met Narayan Murty through my friend Prasanna who is now the Wipro chief, who was also training in Telco. Most of the books that Prasanna lent me had Murty's name on them which meant that I had a preconceived image of the man. Contrary to expectation, Murty was shy, bespectacled and an introvert. When he invited us for dinner.I was a bit taken aback as I thought the young man was making a very fast move. I refused since I was the only girl in the group. But Murty was relentless and we all decided to meet for dinner the next day at 7.30 p.m. at Green Fields hotel on the Main Road ,Pune. The next day I went there at 7' o clock since I had to go to the tailor near the hotel. And what do I see?
Mr. Murty waiting in front of the hotel and it was only seven.
Till today, Murty maintains that I had mentioned (consciously!) that I would be going to the tailor at 7 so that I could meet him...And I maintain that I did not say any such thing consciously or unconsciously because I did not think of Murty as anything other than a friend at that stage. We have agreed to disagree on this matter. Soon, we became friends.
Our conversations were filled with Murty's experiences abroad and the books that he has read. My friends insisted that Murty as trying to impress me because he was interested in me. kept denying it till one fine day, after dinner Murty said, I want to tell you something. I knew this as it. It was coming. He said, I am 5'4" tall. I come from a lower middle class family. I can never become rich in my life and I can never give you any riches. You are beautiful, bright, and intelligent and you can get
anyone you want. But will you marry me?
I asked Murty to give me some time for an answer.
My father didn't want me to marry a wannabe politician, (a communist at that) who didn't have a steady job and wanted to build an orphanage...
My father didn't want me to marry a wannabe politician, (a communist at that) who didn't have a steady job and wanted to build an orphanage...
When I went to Hubli I told my parents about Murty and his proposal. My mother was positive since Murty was also from Karnataka, seemed intelligent and comes from a good family.But my father asked: What's his job, his salary, his qualifications etc? Murty was working as a research assistant and was earning less than me. He was willing to go dutch with me on our outings. My parents agreed to meet Murty in Pune on a particular day at10 a. m sharp.Murty did not turn up. How can I trust a man to take care of my daughter if he cannot keep an appointment, asked my father. At 12noon Murty turned up in a bright red shirt! He had gone on work to Bombay, was stuck in a traffic jam on the ghats, so he hired a taxi(though it was very expensive for him) to meet his would-be father-in-law.
Father was unimpressed. My father asked him what he wanted to become in life.Murty said he wanted to become a politician in the communist party and wanted to open an orphanage. My father gave his verdict. NO. I don't want my daughter to marry somebody who wants to become a communist and then open an orphanage when he himself didn't have money to support his family. Ironically, today, I have opened many orphanages something, which Murty wanted to do 25 years ago. By this time I realized I had developed a liking towards Murty which could only be termed as love. I wanted to marry Murty because he is an honest man.He proposed to me highlighting the negatives in his life. I promised my father that I will not marry Murty without his blessings though at the same time, I cannot marry anybody else. My father said he would agree if Murty promised to take up a steady job. But Murty refused saying he will not do things in life because somebody wanted him to.So, I was caught between the two most important people in my life.
The stalemate continued for three years during which our courtship took us
to every restaurant and cinema hall in Pune. In those days, Murty was always broke. Moreover, he didn't earn much to manage. Ironically today, he manages Infosys Technologies Ltd., one of the world's most reputed companies. He always owed me money. We used to go for dinner and he would say, I don't have money with me, you pay my share, I will return it to you later. For three years I maintained a book on Murty's debt to me.. No, he never returned the money and I finally tore it up after my wedding. The amount was a little over Rs 4000. During this interim period Murty quit his job as research assistant and started his own software business. Now, I had to pay his salary too!
Towards the late 70s computers were entering India in a big way. During the fag end of 1977 Murty decided to take up a job as General Manager at Patni Computers in Bombay. But before he joined the company he wanted to marry me since he was to go on training to the US after joining. My father gave in as he was happy Murty had a decent job, now.
WE WERE MARRIED IN MURTY'S HOUSE IN BANGALORE ON FEBRUARY 10, 1978 WITH ONLY OUR TWO FAMILIES PRESENT.I GOT MY FIRST SILK SARI. THE WEDDING EXPENSES CAME TO ONLY RS 800 (US $17) WITH MURTY AND I POOLING IN RS 400 EACH.
I went to the US with Murty after marriage. Murty encouraged me to see America on my own because I loved travelling. I toured America for three months on backpack and had interesting experiences which will remain freshin my mind forever. Like the time when the New York police took me into custody because they thought I was an Italian trafficking drugs in Harlem . Or the time when I spent the night at the bottom of the Grand Canyon with an old couple. Murty panicked because he couldn't get a response from my hotel room even at midnight. He thought I was either killed or kidnapped.
IN 1981 MURTY WANTED TO START INFOSYS. HE HAD A VISION AND ZERO CAPITAL...initially I was very apprehensive about Murty getting into business. We did not have any business background ..
Moreover we were living a comfortable life in Bombay with a regular pay check and I didn't want to rock the boat. But Murty was passionate about creating good quality software. I decided to support him. Typical of Murty, he just had a dream and no money. So I gave him Rs 10,000 which I had saved for a rainy day, without his knowledge and told him, This is all I have. Take it. I give you three years sabbatical leave. I will take care of the financial needs of our house. You go and chase your dreams without any worry. But you have only three years!
Murty and his six colleagues started Infosys in 1981,with enormous interest and hard work. In 1982 I left Telco and moved to Pune with Murty.
We bought a small house on loan which also became the Infosys office. I was a clerk-cum-cook-cum-programmer. I also took up a job as Senior Systems Analyst with Walchand group of Industries to support the house. In 1983 Infosys got their first client, MICO, in Bangalore . Murty moved to Bangalore and stayed with his mother while I went to Hubli to deliver my second child, Rohan. Ten days after my son was born, Murty left for the US on project work.
I saw him only after a year, as I was unable to join Murty in the US because my son had infantile eczema,
an allergy to vaccinations. So for more than a year I did not step outside our home for fear of my son contracting an infection. It was only after Rohan got all his vaccinations that I came to Bangalore where we rented a small house in Jayanagar and rented another house as Infosys headquarters. My father presented Murty a scooter to commute. I once again became ! a cook, programmer, clerk, secretary, office assistant et al. Nandan Nilekani (MD of Infosys) and his wife Rohini stayed with us.
While Rohini babysat my son, I wrote programs for Infosys. There was no car, no phone, and just two kids and a bunch of us working hard, juggling our lives and having fun while Infosys was taking shape. It was not only me but also the wives of other partners too who gave their unstinted support. We all knew that our men were trying to build something good. It was like a big joint family,taking care and looking out for one another.
I still remember Sudha Gopalakrishna looking after my daughter Akshata with all care and love while Kumari Shibulal cooked for all of us.
Murty made it very clear that it would either be me or him working at Infosys. Never the two of us together... I was involved with Infosys initially.
Father was unimpressed. My father asked him what he wanted to become in life.Murty said he wanted to become a politician in the communist party and wanted to open an orphanage. My father gave his verdict. NO. I don't want my daughter to marry somebody who wants to become a communist and then open an orphanage when he himself didn't have money to support his family. Ironically, today, I have opened many orphanages something, which Murty wanted to do 25 years ago. By this time I realized I had developed a liking towards Murty which could only be termed as love. I wanted to marry Murty because he is an honest man.He proposed to me highlighting the negatives in his life. I promised my father that I will not marry Murty without his blessings though at the same time, I cannot marry anybody else. My father said he would agree if Murty promised to take up a steady job. But Murty refused saying he will not do things in life because somebody wanted him to.So, I was caught between the two most important people in my life.
The stalemate continued for three years during which our courtship took us
to every restaurant and cinema hall in Pune. In those days, Murty was always broke. Moreover, he didn't earn much to manage. Ironically today, he manages Infosys Technologies Ltd., one of the world's most reputed companies. He always owed me money. We used to go for dinner and he would say, I don't have money with me, you pay my share, I will return it to you later. For three years I maintained a book on Murty's debt to me.. No, he never returned the money and I finally tore it up after my wedding. The amount was a little over Rs 4000. During this interim period Murty quit his job as research assistant and started his own software business. Now, I had to pay his salary too!
Towards the late 70s computers were entering India in a big way. During the fag end of 1977 Murty decided to take up a job as General Manager at Patni Computers in Bombay. But before he joined the company he wanted to marry me since he was to go on training to the US after joining. My father gave in as he was happy Murty had a decent job, now.
WE WERE MARRIED IN MURTY'S HOUSE IN BANGALORE ON FEBRUARY 10, 1978 WITH ONLY OUR TWO FAMILIES PRESENT.I GOT MY FIRST SILK SARI. THE WEDDING EXPENSES CAME TO ONLY RS 800 (US $17) WITH MURTY AND I POOLING IN RS 400 EACH.
I went to the US with Murty after marriage. Murty encouraged me to see America on my own because I loved travelling. I toured America for three months on backpack and had interesting experiences which will remain freshin my mind forever. Like the time when the New York police took me into custody because they thought I was an Italian trafficking drugs in Harlem . Or the time when I spent the night at the bottom of the Grand Canyon with an old couple. Murty panicked because he couldn't get a response from my hotel room even at midnight. He thought I was either killed or kidnapped.
IN 1981 MURTY WANTED TO START INFOSYS. HE HAD A VISION AND ZERO CAPITAL...initially I was very apprehensive about Murty getting into business. We did not have any business background ..
Moreover we were living a comfortable life in Bombay with a regular pay check and I didn't want to rock the boat. But Murty was passionate about creating good quality software. I decided to support him. Typical of Murty, he just had a dream and no money. So I gave him Rs 10,000 which I had saved for a rainy day, without his knowledge and told him, This is all I have. Take it. I give you three years sabbatical leave. I will take care of the financial needs of our house. You go and chase your dreams without any worry. But you have only three years!
Murty and his six colleagues started Infosys in 1981,with enormous interest and hard work. In 1982 I left Telco and moved to Pune with Murty.
We bought a small house on loan which also became the Infosys office. I was a clerk-cum-cook-cum-programmer. I also took up a job as Senior Systems Analyst with Walchand group of Industries to support the house. In 1983 Infosys got their first client, MICO, in Bangalore . Murty moved to Bangalore and stayed with his mother while I went to Hubli to deliver my second child, Rohan. Ten days after my son was born, Murty left for the US on project work.
I saw him only after a year, as I was unable to join Murty in the US because my son had infantile eczema,
an allergy to vaccinations. So for more than a year I did not step outside our home for fear of my son contracting an infection. It was only after Rohan got all his vaccinations that I came to Bangalore where we rented a small house in Jayanagar and rented another house as Infosys headquarters. My father presented Murty a scooter to commute. I once again became ! a cook, programmer, clerk, secretary, office assistant et al. Nandan Nilekani (MD of Infosys) and his wife Rohini stayed with us.
While Rohini babysat my son, I wrote programs for Infosys. There was no car, no phone, and just two kids and a bunch of us working hard, juggling our lives and having fun while Infosys was taking shape. It was not only me but also the wives of other partners too who gave their unstinted support. We all knew that our men were trying to build something good. It was like a big joint family,taking care and looking out for one another.
I still remember Sudha Gopalakrishna looking after my daughter Akshata with all care and love while Kumari Shibulal cooked for all of us.
Murty made it very clear that it would either be me or him working at Infosys. Never the two of us together... I was involved with Infosys initially.
Nandan Nilekani suggested I should be on the Board but Murty said he did not want a husband and wife team at Infosys. I was shocked since I had the relevant experience and technical
qualifications.
He said, Sudha if you want to work with Infosys, I will
withdraw, happily.
qualifications.
He said, Sudha if you want to work with Infosys, I will
withdraw, happily.
I was pained to know that I will not be involved in the company my husband was building and that I would have to give up a job
that I am qualified to do and love doing. It took me a couple of days to
grasp the reason behind Murty's request..
I realized that to make Infosys a success one had to give one's 100 percent.
One had to be focussed on it alone with no other distractions.
that I am qualified to do and love doing. It took me a couple of days to
grasp the reason behind Murty's request..
I realized that to make Infosys a success one had to give one's 100 percent.
One had to be focussed on it alone with no other distractions.
If the two of us had to give 100 percent to Infosys then what would happen to our home and our children? One of us had to take care of our home while the other took care of
Infosys. I opted to be a homemaker, after all Infosys was Murty's dream. It
was a big sacrifice but it was one that had to be made.
Even today, Murty says, Sudha, I stepped on your
career to make mine. You are responsible for my success.
I might have given up my career for my husband's
sake. But that does not make me a doormat
Infosys. I opted to be a homemaker, after all Infosys was Murty's dream. It
was a big sacrifice but it was one that had to be made.
Even today, Murty says, Sudha, I stepped on your
career to make mine. You are responsible for my success.
I might have given up my career for my husband's
sake. But that does not make me a doormat
JRD Tata: An Experience shared by Sudha Narayan Murty
THERE are two photographs that hang on my office wall.
Everyday when I enter my office I look at them before starting my day.
They are pictures of two old people.
One is of a gentleman in a blue suit and the other is a black and whiteimage of a man with dreamy eyes and a white beard.
People have often asked me if the people in the photographs are related to me.
Some have even asked me, “Is this black and white photo that of aSufi saint or a religious Guru?”
I smile and reply “No, nor are they related to me. These people made An impact on my life. I am grateful to them.”
“Who are they?”
“The man in the blue suit is Bharat Ratna JRD Tata and the black andwhite photo is of Jamsetji Tata.”
“But why do you have them in your office?”
" You can call it gratitude.”
Then, invariably, I have to tell the person the following story.
It was a long time ago. I was young and bright, bold and idealistic.I was in the final year of my Master’s course in Computer Science atThe Indian Institute of Science (IISc) in Bangalore, then known as the TataInstitute. Life was full of fun and joy. I did not know what helplessnessor injustice meant.
It was probably the April of 1974. Bangalore was getting warm and gulmohars were blooming at the IISc campus. I was the only girl in my postgraduate department and was staying at the ladies’ hostel.
Other girls were pursuing research in different departments of Science. I was looking forward to going abroad to complete a doctorate in computer science. I had been offered scholarships from Universities in the US. Ihad not thought of taking up a job in India.
One day, while on the way to my hostel from our lecture-hall complex, I saw an advertisement on the notice board.It was a standard job-requirement notice from the famous automobilecompany Telco (now Tata Motors). It stated that the company required young, bright engineers, hardworking and with an excellent academic background, etc.
At the bottom was a small line: “Lady candidates need not apply.”
I read it and was very upset. For the first time in my life I was up against gender discrimination.Though I was not keen on taking up the job, I saw it as a challenge. Ihad done extremely well in academics, better than most of my male peers.Little did I know then that in real life academic excellence is notenough to be successful.
After reading the notice I went fuming to my room. I decided to inform the topmost person in Telco’s management about the injustice thecompany was perpetrating. I got a postcard and started to write, butthere was a problem: I did not know who headed Telco. I thought it must beone of the Tatas.
I knew JRD Tata was the head of the Tata Group; I had seen his pictures in newspapers (actually, Sumant Moolgaokar was the company’s chairman then).
I took the card, addressed it to JRD and started writing. To this day Iremember clearly what I wrote.
“The great Tatas have always been pioneers. They are the people who started the basic infrastructure industries in India, such as iron and steel, chemicals, textiles and locomotives.They have cared for higher education in India, such asiron and steel, chemicals, textiles and locomotives. They have cared for higher education in India since 1900 and they were responsible for the establishment of the Indian Institute of Science. Fortunately, I study there. But I am surprised how a company such as Telco is discriminatingon the basis of gender.”
I posted the letter and forgot about it.
Less than 10 days later, Ireceived a telegram stating that I had to appear for an interview at Telco’s Pune facility at the company’s expense. I was taken aback by the telegram. My hostel mate told me I should use the opportunity to goto Pune free of cost and buy them the famous Pune saris forcheap!I collected Rs 30 each from everyone who wanted a sari.
When I look back,I feel like laughing at the reasons for my going, but back then they seemed good enough to make the trip.It was my first visit to Pune and I immediately fell in love with the city. To this day it remains dear to me. I feel as much at home in Pune as I do in Hubli, my hometown. The place changed my life in so many ways.
As directed, I went to Telco’s Pimpri office for the interview.
There were six people on the panel and I realised then that this was serious business.
“This is the girl who wrote to JRD,” I heard somebody whisper as soon as I entered the room. By then I knew for sure that I would not get the job.The realisation abolished all fear from my mind, so I was rather cool while the interview was being conducted.
Even before the interview started, I reckoned the panel was biased, soI told them, rather impolitely, “I hope this is only a technical interview.” They were taken aback by my rudeness, and even today I am ashamed about my attitude.
The panel asked me technical questions and I answered all of them. Then an elderly gentleman with an affectionate voice told me, “Do you know whywe said lady candidates need not apply? The reason is that we have never employed any ladies on the shop floor. This is not a co-ed college;this is a factory. When it comes to academics, you are a first ranker throughout.We appreciate that, but people like you should work in research laboratories.”
I was a young girl from small-town Hubli. My world had been a limited place. I did not know the ways of large corporate housesand their difficulties, so I answered, “But you must start somewhere,otherwise no woman will ever be able to work in your factories.”
Finally, after a long interview, I was told I had been successful. So this was what the future had in store for me. Never had I thought I wouldtake up a job in Pune. I met a shy young man from Karnataka there, we became good friends and we got married.
It was only after joining Telco that I realised who JRD was: the uncrowned king of Indian industry. Now I was scared, but I did not get to meet him till I was transferred to Bombay. One day I had to show somereports to Mr Moolgaokar, our chairman, who we all knew as SM. I was in his office on the first floor of Bombay House (the Tata headquarters)when, suddenly JRD walked in. That was the first time I saw “appro JRD”.Appro means “our” in Gujarati. This was the affectionate term by whichpeople at BombayHouse called him.
I was feeling very nervous, remembering my postcard episode.SM introduced me nicely, “Jeh (that’s what his close associates called him), this young woman is an engineer and that too a postgraduate. She is the first woman to work on the Telco shop floor.”
JRD looked at me.I was praying he would not ask me any questions about my interview (orthe postcard that preceded it). Thankfully, he didn’t. Instead, heremarked. “It is nice that girls are getting into engineering in ourcountry. By the way, what is your name?”
“When I joined Telco I was Sudha Kulkarni, Sir,” I replied. “Now I amSudha Murthy.” He smiled and kindly smile and started a discussion with SM. As for me, I almost ran out of the room.
After that I used to see JRD on and off. He was the Tata Group chairman and I was merely an engineer. There was nothing that we had in common.I was in awe of him.
One day I was waiting for Murthy, my husband, to pick me up after office hours. To my surprise I saw JRD standing next to me. I did not know how to react. Yet again I started worrying about that postcard.
Looking back,I realise JRD had forgotten about it. It must have been asmall incident for him, but not so for me.
“Young lady, why are you here?” he asked. “Office time is over.”
I said, “Sir, I’m waiting for my husband to come and pick me up.”
JRD said, “It is getting dark and there’s no one in the corridor. I’ll wait with you till your husband comes.”
I was quite used to waiting for Murthy, but having JRD waiting Alongside made me extremely uncomfortable
.I was nervous. Out of the corner of my eye I looked at him. He wore asimple white pant and shirt. He was old, yet his face was glowing.There wasn’t any air of superiority about him.
I was thinking, “Look at this person.He is a chairman, a well-respected man in our country and he is waiting for the sake of an ordinary employee.”
Then I saw Murthy and I rushed out. JRD called and said, “Young lady,tell your husband never to make his wife wait again.”
In 1982 I had to resign from my job at Telco.I was reluctant to go,but I really did not have a choice. I was coming down the steps of Bombay House after wrapping up my final settlement when
I saw JRD coming up. He was absorbed in thought. I wanted to say goodbye to him, so I stopped. He saw me and paused.
Gently, he said, “So what are you doing, Mrs Kulkarni?” (That was theway he always addressed me.)
“Sir, I am leaving Telco.”
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“Pune, Sir. My husband is starting a company called Infosys and I’m shifting to Pune.”
“Oh! And what will you do when you are successful.”
“Sir, I don’t know whether we will be successful.”
“Never start with diffidence,” he advised me. “Always start with confidence. When you are successful you must give back to society.Society gives us so much; we must reciprocate. I wish you all the best.”
Then JRD continued walking up the stairs. I stood there for what seemed like a millennium. That was the last time I saw him alive.
Many years later I met Ratan Tata in the same Bombay House, occupying the chair JRD once did. I told him of my many sweet memories of working with Telco.Later, he wrote to me, “It was nice hearing about Jeh from you.The sad part is that he’s not alive to see you today.”
I consider JRD a great man because, despite being an extremely busy person, he valued one postcard written by a young girl seeking justice.He must have received thousands of letters everyday.He could have thrown mine away, but he didn’t do that.He respected the intentions of that unknown girl, who had neither influencen or money, and gave her an opportunity in his company.
He did not merely give her a job; he changed her life and mindset forever.
Close to 50 per cent of the students in today’s engineering colleges are girls. And there are women on the shop floor in many industry segments.I see these changes and I think of JRD. If at all time stops and asksme what I want from life, I would say I wish JRD were alive today to seehow the company we started has grown. He would have enjoyed it wholeheartedly.
